What’s YOUR Poison?

Share it

In working with thousands of women over the years at Bombshell who are in pursuit of their fitness goals, I have coached women from all walks of life and from around the globe; Physicians, lawyers, students, homemakers and everything in between.  These are intelligent women that successfully manage their daily lives and the lives of others.  But without fail, at one time or another, they all come across something that causes them to struggle when it comes to managing their healthy lifestyle.  Struggling with achieving your weight loss and fitness goals does not mean that you are not strong, smart, worthy or intelligent.  It simply means that reaching these goals is a challenge for you, and that is okay!  The key to getting past these challenges is figuring out what your personal poison is that may be keeping you from success.  Identify the factors make YOU struggle and from there you will be able to take the steps necessary to change the behavior.

Robert Sternberg, a Professor of Psychology at Yale University has constructed several theories upon why seemingly “smart” people make foolish choices that lead them to fail.  Sternberg has identified the following seven factors which may be may be responsible for these behaviors; Lack of motivation, lack of impulse control, lack of perseverance, fear of failure, procrastination, inability to delay gratification and too little or too much self-confidence.   Let’s take these seven factors and equate them to fitness success, to help us determine WHY as smart women, we struggle to succeed in reaching our health and fitness goals!

1.      Flip the Switch

The motivation to hit the gym, or to pack your meals each day MUST be there or you simply won’t get it done!  Many women come out of the gate blazing, only to lose that motivation within just a few days of getting started!  The key is to dig deep to find out what drives you.  A goal such as a vacation, wedding, reunion, competition, or simply to fit in a certain pant size are all goals that can assist you in motivation.  Find what motivates YOU and DRIVE toward that goal!

2.     Step Away From the Cookie Jar!

Ah, impulse control!  This one gets everyone at one time or another.  Impulse control does not simply come naturally, it is something that takes effort and planning to master.  Realize that there WILL be occasions in which you are tempted to grab a cookie at work or turn your car into the fast food parking lot.  Understand that if you simply deny the impulse, it WILL go away.  The key is to be PREPARED for these situations and READY to conquer them!

3.     I QUIT!

Perseverance is extremely tough, especially when you want results, NOW!  When the scale doesn’t budge, or you aren’t seeing instant results, is VERY easy to throw in the towel and quit.  The most important thing to remember is that it took a lot of “playing” to get your body where it is now, and it’s going to take a lot of “paying” to make it right!  Fitness is not a game of instant results.  When setting your fitness goals, be prepared for the long haul!  Don’t give up when the results don’t come right away.  Keep plugging along and it WILL happen!

4.     Scaredy Cat

The fear of failure is a huge deterrent to success.  When we fear failure, we are more likely to lose motivation, give in to impulses and quit before we even start.  Many fear that if they do their best and they still don’t lose weight, they will be a failure.  You must CHANGE your innermost thoughts from fearing failure to CRAVING success!  When you crave success, you are more likely to keep going toward that goal you crave, even when it seems very far away.  By craving success, the prospect of doing everything it takes to reach your goal is EXCITING rather than frightening.

5.     I’ll Start My Diet TOMORROW

Procrastination is a nasty little habit that everyone engages in from time to time.  When it comes to your fitness and weight loss goals, there IS no time like TODAY to start.   And as I always say “Someday is NOT a DEY of the Week!”.

6.     But I WANT That Cookie!

Instant gratification feels SO good when you are in the midst of it, and SO bad when you are finished with it!  CHOOSE to delay gratification in order to reach your long term goal!  This does not come automatically, you have to be prepared and ready to make the choice BEFORE it is upon you and decide WHAT is more important to you; the short term gratification of a food item or the long term gratification of SUCCESS!

7.     No Big Deal, I’ll Get the Weight Off

Having TOO much self-confidence can be just as bad as not having enough!  When you are too confident in your ability to lose the weight, it often leads to procrastination and giving in to instant gratification.  When you are under confident, you are more likely to fear failure.  Take a mental inventory and assess your confidence level.  Make sure that it is high enough to crave success but not so high that you put off the tasks necessary to achieve success.

Sternberg’s theories on traits for success show us that succeeding in our fitness and weight loss goals is not simply a haphazard coincidence.  There are several factors that we can control, to assist us in getting where we need to be.  Struggling with achieving your weight loss and fitness goals does not mean that you are not strong, smart, worthy or intelligent.  It simply means that reaching these goals is a challenge, and this challenge can be conquered!  They key is figuring out what your personal poison may be that makes YOU struggle, and then taking the steps necessary to change these behaviors.  Be honest with yourself and assess which of these traits is keeping your from reaching your goals.  Change the behavior surrounding this trait and you will be WELL on your way to fitness success!!


I believe in YOU and your ability to change YOUR life!

Start TODAY, because

“Someday is NOT a DEY of the Week!”



Piers, S. The nature of procrastination: A meta-analytic and theoretical review of quintessential self-regulatory failure. Psychological Bulletin, Vol. 133(1), Jan, 2007. pp. 65-9. US: American Psychological Association

Sternberg, Robert J., The concept of intelligence and its role in lifelong learning and success. American Psychologist, Vol. 52(10), Oct, 1997. pp. 1030-1037, US: American Psychological Association